There are few acts that are truly selfless. Dig into each act of selflessness and there will more than likely be a selfish driver. I offer up my own ethos as an example. While my aim to create positive impact can be selfless – I put other people’s needs before mine quite frequently – I do it because it makes me feel good. It’s often that simple.
The dictionary defines a selfish person as someone concerned primarily with one’s own interests, regardless of others.
The connotation of this is negative and it shouldn’t be. Don’t get me wrong – there are certainly plenty of selfish acts that don’t add positive value to the world. The nature of one’s own interests is what determines the result of selfish endeavors. For instance, If it is your interest to support a charitable effort, like Cycle for Survival or St. Jude Children’s Hospital, then absolutely do so. Supporting a charitable cause is an amazing thing to do. By definition and the nature of the act, you’ll feel good about it, which is positively selfish.
I resonate with the way that Gretchen Rubin eludes to this idea in her book The Happiness Project. If you “do good” you’ll “feel good”, and if you “feel good” you’ll “do good”. It’s a virtuous cycle. When I have the chance to do something good in the world and create a positive ripple I feel good. When I feel good, I am energized and empowered to create more positive ripples.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with “selfish selflessness”. Recognizing it is important to understand another one of the complexities of how we interact with each other. If you take care of yourself then you’ll be in a better emotional state to interact with the world positively. If you take care of yourself by taking care of others, the world benefits endlessly.
